Well, this is pretty goddamn fantastic.
Via Wait, what.
This is William Vahey, who the FBI describes as one of the worst child molesters in history. His wife was a principal and he taught at international schools around the globe, often serving as a coach of youth boys’ teams. He shot himself a couple of weeks ago, right after the FBI got a search warrant to search his thumb drives, where he had stored images of over 90 victims.
Apparently, he was my history teacher in junior high in Saudi Arabia. I don’t remember a goddamn thing about him, which is probably the best thing anyone can say about a child molester. My BFF went on a school sponsored trip to India where apparently, this monster was the school-provided chaperone.
My older (younger) brother had him as a teacher in Jakarta, and my younger brother knew his son well. Both my brother and my bff remember him to be utterly creepy and a jackass, and judging from Facebook, that is the overall consensus.
It has rattled our little community of third culture kids - that this abject monster wandered the halls among us. I don’t remember any “good touch bad touch” type of PSA in Saudi Arabia - and hell, it would have been censored anyway. I think that many of us remember our childhoods abroad as downright idyllic, and it is almost unthinkable to know this beast was among us.
—An email from an entrepreneur I correspond with regularly. Court and I are 8 weeks out from being parents. I’ve been asking men I admire for advice to prepare. (via zachklein)
1. Your wife will, at some point in the first year, go through some form of identity crisis. She’s no longer a sister, daughter, friend, or wife—she’s a mother. And however much a blessing that is, the nuances will screw with how she perceives the world and vice versa. When she’s locked herself in the bathroom over something seemingly trivial (no doubt fueled by exhaustion) and is ranting about who she is and what she’s become, be ready with kleenex and ice cream when she opens the door.
2. As much as you’re partners, your wife has 80% equity to your 20% (and the corresponding responsibilities). Your job is to be *great* dad, but in the early days it’s to be an *amazing* husband. PS. See point 1.
3. Sticking with the business metaphor: your kids are employees. You are owners. The company started long before with you and your wife and will keep going strong after the kids ship off to school. Kids are, oddly, temporary in a way that your spouse isn’t (or shouldn’t be). Yet so many couples build their lives *around* their kids, rather than *with* their kids. Subtle and overt pressures make this easy—like workaholics, you’re celebrated for how you slave over children—but over time this focus channels too much energy away from the core and couples drift, often putting their emotional needs into their children (who for many years easily give that energy back and replace the spouse). Be mindful of this. Remind yourselves that in order for the kids to be healthy, you both have to be healthy, with each other. Create this pattern from day one and never stop.
Ken Bunting died yesterday at the age of 65. He was the former executive editor of the Seattle PI, the husband of Juli, and the father of Max.
He was also one of my favorite people on this planet, and certainly one of the smartest and most decent people I have ever known. He had a laugh that could change your entire week, a hug that could snap you out of the deepest funk, and a sense of humor that could blister the sun.
What I will remember most about Ken is that the man LIVED. He laughed hard and long, he thought deeply and openly, and he loved his wife, son, and friends so honestly it took your breath away.
Not sure if it is awesome or ominous that Opening Day for the Mariners featured a remarkably long celebration of the SuperBowl champion Seahawks, including the first pitch by QB Russell Wilson.