Dear Ridiculously Hot Guy Whom I Rebuked
Dear sir —
Here’s the thing. I wasn’t thinking along those lines. Understand that I have a new dog and that is kind of where my attention is focused except when I am doting on First Dog. When you saw me tonight, I had just done a five miler with Darbs, and I was a little self-conscious. I was sweaty, gross, and just stopping in for some cream cheese. I don’t think we need to visit my hair, which was wild and unkempt, although your remark about me looking “natural” did not go unnoticed.
I wasn’t put off by the corn joke and, in fact, am still laughing about it. Just wish I wasn’t in a primarily organic store while sporting an In and Out Burger t-shirt, coated with sweat. I know you understand, as you texted me twice on my walk home, but understand, I wasn’t really bringing my best game. Also, do all the interesting folks grocery shop at 9pm?
I told you that I was open for dinner tomorrow and let’s see how that goes. Last night, on the walk home, I kicked the shit out of a raccoon that went after First Dog, and there is a little part of me that worries that I have become the dog version of crazy cat lady. Thing is, it felt great to kick the fuck out of that raccoon and I landed a great soccer kick on it.
Anyway, here’s hoping you don’t have a tumblr. Love the initiative on texting me on the walk home. Didn’t weird me out at all - I just have a few things at home to attend to. Also, it is perfectly acceptable to rock out to Oasis if you are singing Whatever. That is a really fucking great song.
