Dear Elizabeth Edwards,
Dear frangry,
I may be a little buzzed, so forgive the spelling and grammatical errors. Here is the thing. While I agree with your general outrage for a woman who is being publicly humiliated, you are kind of off the mark here. It is terribly easy (and kind of natural) to get outraged in their defense, but political wives make a deal with the devil.
I loved Elizabeth Edwards and questioned her husband’s decision to go out on the stump while she was so sick, but in our fucked up country? You have to act like a talk show host (Oprah) to get elected. That is the gig, apparently even if your wife is dying of cancer. I liked Edwards - more than I care to admit — because he seemed both electable and sincere. He is none of those two now.
But let me take an issue with your post. First, few of us on tumblr have lost a child, and, quite frankly, hopefully none of us will. She lost a grown child, one she had known for almost two decades. None of us will hopefully know that kind of sorrow. She is also dealing with an incurable form of cancer. Again, godspeed to all of us. Think about those two events. I can’t fathom it. She knows how she is going to die, and probably has a reliable timetable for that.
That in no way excuses her husband’s infidelity. Far from it, and quite frankly, to the contrary. Just don’t lay blame on a woman who is, perhaps, standing beside her husband of many years, despite the knee jerk reactions of many. This is a Polaroid snapshot on many years of marriage, played out in sound bytes, and yet one she is forced to endure, on account of her husband being a public figure.
I guess the shorter version is this: we ladies can get all righteous and indignant when the poster wives don’t lose their shit when we think they should. But in this case, and perhaps all cases, we need to remember that life isn’t all soundbytes, quotes, and interviews, and none of would want our relationships judged on the lowlights of those private moments. I am in no way giving John Edwards a pass, but am extending one to Elizabeth, who loved this guy through many years, including the loss of their first born. She doesn’t need to be anyone’s role model of wifedom. She is just a chick, dealing with a lot of shit. And maybe, just maybe, she doesn’t want to spend her last years in court and in front of press mics. Maybe she just wants to spend her remaining time with the family that defined her life. I get that.
FUCK YOU. I’m sorry you have cancer and your kid died, etc. But to be honest, everyone has gone through shit like that in their lives. But not everyone sits there and lies and pretends that they are someone they are not. That they are married to someone who doesn’t exist. Fuck you for sitting by a man who you knew was cheating on you, in a time in your life when what you needed was support. Fuck you for supporting someone who is a liar and a fake. Fuck you for helping create a persona that never has existed.
I hope you beat your cancer for your kids. But at the same time, you’re just as bad as your husband.xo,
Frangry
Via FRANGRY
